The Coca-Cola Zero Sugar Review

I have three Coca-Cola Zero Sugar cans in the fridge. I'm cracking one open now, and hopefully I'll still have one when I reach the end of this.

I also feel that, in the interest of integrity and dignity for my position as sometimes a blog writer, to the legions of fans I have, that as I critique this product, I must immediately inform you that I will be high as balls writing this.

Ahem.

Soda has been in my life as long as I can remember it, and I know the same goes for many of you. My earliest affair with soda was the wonderful Dad's Root Beer. From there, I moved to A&W, since we often went to the A&W in my hometown. This went on into my elementary years, as I branched over to Pepsi. I remember having to switch over to caffeine free, probably because I was acting like a freak after that much soda consumption. There wasn't much of a difference, in my mind. A few years later, and after a brief stint with both RC Cola and Barq's, I finally moved to the king of them all.

Coke has been with me ever since, and even as I try on new stuff, it is always reappearing in my fridge. It has a taste so good, it defines soda, and remains the standard choice in most minds. Even as I expanded into energy drinks like my usual Monster Zero Ultra or Green, and several run ins with Wired's Triple Caffeine, the cheaper option of a Coke and the (well) known quality it has makes it easy to grab. When fast food places and restaurants carry the Pepsi brand, you know it's because they got a good deal on it.

But the relationship came to a halt when I first realized that maybe I should be thinking about what I eat and drink each day. This halt became more complicated as Coke's addictive qualities became apparent. Not just the formula itself, but the carbonation. I drink water at some point every day now, but it sucks, and I didn't warm up to milk until recently. I began to reason that, being in my mid 20s, I had time to handle the John Drake life. Nevertheless, I decided on a compromise: Soda Water.

I bought a 12 pack of La Croix Lemon. I had one can.

Taking another Coke Zero Sugar.

I lasted what felt like forever on Walmart's Clear American Strawberry soda water. It didn't really hide the fact that what you're really into soda for is the carbonation, but it was cheaper than regular soda, and there were a shitload of zeroes on the back, so I ran with it. The buildup of cans, however, became something of a nuisance for my living situation with three other roommates. Having already made the first step, I decided to go all in on a SodaStream machine.

The most interesting thing about SodaStream is actually its...history in politics.

The other sorta interesting thing was that it was more of a trade off. I don't think of it as greatly cheaper than buying regular soda. Yes, it's mostly tap water, but it requires flavoring (which can be costly if you're buying the made-for-SodaStream brands, but you don't do that, you buy the Crush water flavorings in the other aisle), and it also requires the monthly or bimonthly visit to somewhere that can refill your CO2 for an okay price. You go to the store a little less than you would (depending on how you do your grocery shopping), but you end up having to go to another place to fill the CO2. Regardless, I don't think there was much difference in that respect.

And in comparison to the Clear American Water brand, SodaStream wasn't much different in taste. You got choices that more resembled the established Coke and Pepsi tastes you know, but the switch wasn't all that different. They both, however, filled the void left by name brand soda the same way: like Captain Janeway filling the void of Jean-Luc Picard. It's not bad or anything. Hell, there are some days I don't think about what I've left behind, and am perfectly content with what I have....

But in the end, it was always about a lazy attempt to get a tad healthier. To not consume so much sugar at the very least. It's what's somehow blown La Croix up, and now I'm seeing people drinking it everywhere. It's been going the last few years at minimum, by my count, and it took up until this point for Coca-Cola to finally decide to have an answer, while also attempting to wield its distinct flavor using its "Zero Calories" branding. But not, it's a new thing. Sorta.

Opening third and final Coke Zero Sugar now.

I haven't had a Diet Coke in a while, but it was definitely a Coke Light, with that heavy aspartame taste, which was present in Coke Zero and is still here in Coke Zero Sugar as well. If I remember correctly, Coke Zero was sort of the soda that bridged the gap of taste between Coke and Diet Coke. I never drank much of Coke Zero because it was a lesser version of Coke and its hook was zero calories, which I'm still not too concerned about right now. However, that was enough to convert many people, and its ousting to make room for Zero Sugar has ruffled a feather or two.

Overall, I'm satisfied with the taste. It's definitely a Coke brand soda. For those who are looking for something that tastes like regular Coke, you will be disappointed. However, this doesn't strike me as all that different from Coke Zero, and I actually like it a little better than how I remember the last Zero I drank, though I wonder if coming from drinking mostly soda water is coloring my experience. If this opinion holds, though, this will only help Coke win over people like me, which will help them gain back some of us who have decided that no sugar is what's in right now, and we'll be comfortable with what we've currently chosen not to know about soda until sometime later down the road.

For now, after years of mostly avoiding it, I've gone full circle back to Coke again, only this time with a can sporting mostly zeroes on the back, no sugar, and the interspersing of other occasional drinks like water, Monster Green, coffee, milk, and Sparkling Ice Lemonade flavored water. Hmm. You know, I probably haven't improved my health at all, but in a way I feel like Coca-Cola and I found a compromise in a small war. As I get older, I'll need to drink better and more consciously, for my own sake. But drawing Coke this way just a smidge was enough to take me back over to to an old, addictive friend for a little longer. And if that is enough of a benefit for you, maybe check this out. If not, don't worry about it, just put your hands behind your head and proudly proclaim Coke's superiority. I'll just look down on you.

No I won't, that's mean, you're a good person.