SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!! SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!
by mattyftm
This is a true story!!!! Once upon a time on a fine November evening, a bear with a green hat and red bow tie is taking a gentle stroll through the Giant Bomb Forums. He is stopping to converse with people. Talking about his favourite video games with some random humour mixed in. Suddenly out of no where, he spots a forum thread titled "is that time again, GB". He is intrigued by such a vague p...
This is a true story!!!!
Once upon a time on a fine November evening, a bear with a green hat and red bow tie is taking a gentle stroll through the Giant Bomb Forums. He is stopping to converse with people. Talking about his favourite video games with some random humour mixed in. Suddenly out of no where, he spots a forum thread titled "is that time again, GB". He is intrigued by such a vague premise. "What is it time for again?" he wonders aloud as his curiosity gets the better of him, and he enters the thread to investigate further. Upon entering the thread, he discovers a horror, an injustice that he could barely comprehend... IT WAS A USER REQUESTING THAT PEOPLE PUT SANTA HATS ON THEIR AVATAR'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS HORRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! To understand the full horror of this atrocity, we must revisit the start of this sad tale. "Once upon a time on a fine NOVEMBER evening". The bear was shocked that this could happen so early. He had to do something about it...
The bear quickly rushed to his secret lair, where he hatched a plan. He quickly drew up a shopping list and headed out the door to the supermarket:
He returned with his shopping and entered his tool shed. For days bizarre noises came out of the shed, until finally the door opened, and what should exit...Tin Foil
Wire Coat Hangers
Red Dye No.2
A Sony Walkman
Elastic Bands
A Car Battery
KY Jelly
Frozen Pizza
Yellow Paint
Cider
Fork Handles
An Audi A4
A Hamster & Hamster Wheel
A Robot Communist exited the shed. "SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" it shouted "SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!". The bear had created an anti-christmas pro-communism robot that will forever be known as "Robot Communist". As he walked down the street into the distance on his quest to rid the world of Christmas Hats, the screams of children could be heard. For all fear Robot Communist, and all will fear him for the rest of eternity. And the moral of this story?
SAY NO TO SANTA HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SAY YES TO COMMUNISM AND ROBOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!