Thanks to all of the horrid AVGN clones on Youtube, you’re no doubt well aware of the Sega Genesis' ghastly brawler known as Shaq Fu, and honestly, having me repeat and carbon copy all of the raging lunatics’ ranting and raving would make me look pretty stupid, if not more stupid.
For those of you with enough intelligence to avoid these failures of video crafters, let me quickly sum up why Shaq Fu is bad (Notice I say bad, and not a abomination; I’ll get to that later): First, is the laughably bad plot. Shaq meets old dude, old dude calls Shaq the chosen one, Shaq goes to save kid, he gets yellow hair, he becomes an anime; nothing we haven’t seen before. Secondly, the awful controls that either don’t work half the time, or refuse to work even after punching it in well over a hundred times. Thirdly, which is the deal breaker for me, is how the AI opponents in the single player mode are much better equipped special-wise, not to mention have you beat at just about every angle when it comes to speed, range, and general I’M-AN-ANIME-ness. Shaq’s move list is pitiful, and what specials he does have are, again, unresponsive to pull off, or have meagre range. I could go on for a while on why this game is bad and annoys me near to the point of exploding, but seeing all these rager’s tear the game a new backside makes me realize something; no one, at least to my knowledge, has mentioned a GOOD thing about the game. “But Dino,” You may ask. “What good can come from a game starring a failed rapper who can’t make a free throw to save his life?”
The multiplayer.
Mario Party. Power Stone. Burnout. Unreal Tournament. Saints Row 2. What do they all have in common? In most cases, they become ten times better when played with others, or played at a party.
Shaq Fu can easily enter the realm of bad when played by yourself, but it also enters the realm of ‘it’s-so-bad-it’s-good’ mentality when two or more people join in, either to play or spectate. Let’s take the aforementioned Saints Row 2 for example; while a good game, if played alone, it doesn’t live up to its main appeal, its glitches and hiccups easily becoming noticeable. But when played in co-op or multiplayer, you, and everyone else playing, forget any glitches or complaints you may have, as it becomes an utter blast to play while blowing up and smack talking everyone else. Shaq Fu follows the same mantra; played alone, the sheer bad nature of the game is wide open for ridicule and frustrated controller smashing, but when played with two people or when hauled out at a party, many of its problems seem to vanish as the Prince of Persia copycat whoops on the Green Goblin’s retarded cousin like they were re-creating the end to the first Spiderman movie. It’s just you and other people laughing as Shaq goes face down to the concrete time and time again, or the shit-talking flying when the multiplayer starts.
Now, I must reinstate the fact that the single player is awful. There’s no way around it. But with two players, or playing with a bunch of people around, is an awkward joy, able to laugh at a bad game without fear of retribution. So either bust out the Genesis or emulator, grab a few beers, get a few friends, and have a gay ol’ time.
But Shaq is still the worst fighter in the game.
