A Brief Jaunt to... Japan! (Day 2: Shinjuku)
by mento
Ohayou! We're now in Day 2 of our virtual Japanese vacation, courtesy of the edutainment visual novel Go! Go! Nippon! ~My First Trip to Japan~ (tildes till the end). Today we're heading to Shinjuku, perhaps best known for hosting Kabukicho - Tokyo's infamous red light district. However, this decision was less spurred by wanting to see even more inadvertent creepery (creepitude? creeposcity?) th...
Ohayou! We're now in Day 2 of our virtual Japanese vacation, courtesy of the edutainment visual novel Go! Go! Nippon! ~My First Trip to Japan~ (tildes till the end). Today we're heading to Shinjuku, perhaps best known for hosting Kabukicho - Tokyo's infamous red light district. However, this decision was less spurred by wanting to see even more inadvertent creepery (creepitude? creeposcity?) than the fact that I'm semi-familiar with this area due to the Yakuza games, which largely take place in a fictionalized but otherwise identical version of this district.
Who knows? Maybe the game will finally stop being so damn saucy for one day and just give me an innocuously wholesome day of sightseeing and history lessons.
Part 03: JAPANESE PIZZA! YAKUZA 3 CODES INSIDE EVERY BOX! PARTY TIME SONIC THE HEDGEHOG LET'S GO! GEORGE FOREMAN!
NO. BAD GAME, BAD. 
Stylish? What's stylish? What has style got to do with inadvertent anime nudity? What does this even mean?!
Yeah, let's just keep digging this hole we're in. I'll break out the Matlocks.
God? There is no God here. No God would allow this in an all-ages educational game about Japan.
I think I know how this game is going to end, guys.
Why don't you explain what rice is too, while we're here?
Right, so we're off to Shinjuku. I'm just a glutton for punishment. Glutton for something, anyway.
I'm, uh... gonna have to plead the fifth here.
This game was honestly the last place I'd expect to find a City Hunter reference, but then considering that manga is about a dude who turns into a raging lech whenever women are around perhaps I shouldn't be surprised.
We apparently spent the whole day walking around, presumably so we could have a nighttime Kabukicho scene.
Yep, we're in the red light district with a teenager we met on the internet. Wonderful.
Agh, Yakuza 2 flashbacks flooding through my mind. I really hope I don't have to fight a pair of tigers tomorrow. Wait, what am I saying? That'd be awesome.
Too bad. The next time we see her will probably be on one of those websites you're not supposed to visit.
Or maybe she's just getting hit on by a creepy street tough ten yards away. Who am I, Detective Stabler?
'Hey Noob Saibot, get your damn hands off her!'
I actually told him to beat it in English. Apparently that's intimidating. So, good tip for anyone dealing with muggers in Japan: just yell at them in English and they'll leave you alone.
So here we reveal the biggest twist of them all: Goku is none other than our very own Brad Shoemaker!
This is the first non-itinerary choice I've seen so far. I gotta know what Japanese pizza is. It's corn and mayonnaise, right?
If you say so. Grilled pancake, pizza, same difference. And yeah, it looks like I really did drench it in mayo. Bon appetit!
Once I'm done throwing up in the bathroom (and provided I don't turn on the bidet again, because that could get real messy), we'll move onto Day 3. But what else is there left to see after manga and strippers? I guess we'll find out.