“I need scissors, 61!” Shooting the moon. http://deckers.die. These are famous moments when the rules of a game’s world suddenly break down, and suddenly the experience elevates to something special. But, unfortunately, examples within classic gaming are rare, and the closest most have come are flash games, indie “retro titles” like Super Meat Boy, ROM hacks like Super Mario Bros. 3 Challenge Version, and the Namco Generations series.
Look no further than Not Tetris 2 to eat up all your spare time. As most of us know, Tetris operates on a sort of grid; when you move your block as it’s falling in Tetris, it moves over one block unit at a time. Without this rule, the game would be absolute anarchy.
But, as always, the Internet finds a way.
Not Tetris 2 is simply a rerelease of Not Tetris, a game in which the grid structure of Tetris is replaced with a realistic physics engine focused upon causing your brilliant tower of S-blocks to tumble and really, really ruin your day. Spinning your blocks with the Z and W keys, they will tumble around in circles without expert timing or the use of a handy-dandy wall. The moment a block hits another block, it will tumble into freefall, often tearing apart your well-laid plans. The difficulty is absurd, especially when one considers the random element that leads to Tetris being difficult in the first place. Six T-blocks is a crime that should be committed upon no one, and stacking them without making an absurd mess will be an absolute nightmare to any who decide to play this game.
Of course, there is a way to score big in Not Tetris. One suggestion I would make is to stick to the new normal mode rather than attempting the stack mode. Normal mode allows for you to simply line up nine of the ten blocks in a single row to cause the row to erase, meaning your lack of perfect computerized precision will still allow you to actually play the game.
Once you find your rhythm, though, the game almost becomes more exciting than the original Tetris. While tragedies of large towers falling will occur, the game is so intensely difficult that simply scoring a few line breaks will be enough to keep you satisfied. Those who are used to being good at Tetris, however, will pull their hair out; as a bad Tetris player, I’ve managed a high score of a little under 12000, with my two behind it being at roughly 10000 and 7500 points. I’ve rarely come close since I set those scores, of course.
The game’s art is based upon the original Game Boy version, no doubt adding to the nostalgic terror I feel playing this game. The music is as you would hope (with the classic theme appearing as Type A.) You also have five or so options for window size (as well as a full-screen option) and the ability to change the color of the screen, meaning those who want their classic pale green will easily be able to access it.
The initial appeal of the game is a sort of nightmarish curiosity. Looking to my left as I ride this bus back into Madison, I see another bus rider with a classic Game Boy in hand, no doubt Tetris-ing like mad in between text messages. Were I to tell any sane Tetris player there existed a version of the game where there were no grid rules, they would look at me like I was a fool. Who would even want to play Tetris that way? The original game is challenging enough!
But once you take the leap and start really playing Not Tetris, the intense difficulty becomes exciting and desirable. I’ve happily worn the battery of this little Macbook multiple times trying to even earn 3000 points or so, and I really can’t stop playing. And, more than anything else, Not Tetris made me care about and love Tetris again, for the first time since the DS entry. You can download it for free here.