Let's talk about Dungeon Keeper...the new one I mean.
by halomaste19
I've never played the original Dungeon Keeper series, so I went into the new game from EA Mythic with an open mind. I didn't bring any nostalgia or memories. I also didn't bring any money, which means I'm screwed. *(To Continue Reading this Dungeon Keeper Impression please wait 2 hours OR use 10 Blue Gems)* As I downloaded Dungeon Keeper from the Play Store, I was thinking about all the hate th...
I've never played the original Dungeon Keeper series, so I went into the new game from EA Mythic with an open mind. I didn't bring any nostalgia or memories. I also didn't bring any money, which means I'm screwed.
*(To Continue Reading this Dungeon Keeper Impression please wait 2 hours OR use 10 Blue Gems)*
As I downloaded Dungeon Keeper from the Play Store, I was thinking about all the hate that people online were throwing at the game. Was it really that bad? Well, 5 minutes in this convinced me we were in disgusting territory.


To make things worst, when you spend gems he, "Horny", laughs at you or makes fun of you. He even bemoans the fact that you aren't spending more money on your dungeon. It literally is like the devil tempting you.
*(OH No, looks like you want to keep reading this Dungeon Keeper Impression- please wait 20 Weeks OR use 200 Green Crystals tm)*
The basic idea of Dungeon Keeper is to create a massive and dangerous dungeon. Which you do by digging out tunnels and building rooms. Which, should be a fun and strategic part of the game. Except, its not. Instead its a giant waiting game. And I mean waiting game. Some of the blocks only take 5 seconds to break down, but others take 45 minutes, 4 hours or even more. Like how about a whole fucking day..
249 Gems = about $2.50*(Your Energy Meter is Depleted!! Share this Impression with 20 friends to get a FREE refill OR Wait 3 hours.)*
What makes this wait worse is that you have to have a minion to do anything, whether that's placing a trap or a door or digging out your dungeon's tunnels.Which wouldn't be that bad if minions weren't ridiculously expensive..which they are. They are laughably over priced. A single minion costs... 800 Gems. Now here is the price breakdown on the Gems..
Here's a tip: Spending $100 on fake consumable gems is NEVER the "Best Value". Ever.
The saddest part about Dungeon Keeper is that at its core, there is a fun game here. The basic idea of being the bad guy and building a big dangerous dungeon is cool, as it was in the older games. The art style and voice over work is really nice, even if the writing is a bit annoying. The production values are high, and the touch controls are responsive and easy to use. I even enjoyed attacking other people's dungeons, even if its nearly identical to Clash of Clans, its still a interesting idea.
But by hiding it all behind paywalls and IAPs, behind bullshit micro-transactions and timers it makes me hate playing the game. I mean, what this game and similar games are basically saying is this: "Our game isn't very fun & there is not a lot to do, and if you WANT to just skip this stuff well, you can. Just give us some money." And if any game designer or creator is OK with that message, then I hope they stop making games. I hate sounding like an old man, yelling at the kids on his front yard. But this is not how games should work.So just please, leave this industry before you take part in ruining another franchise. Please.
But, what do you think?