by mento
Hello, this is my list of shame for 2017. The title's a pun; please don't actually go out and humiliate teenagers, for theirs is already a hard lot. An unexpectedly hard lot, even, often while they're having to stand in front of a whole room of people. You know what? This list is about 2017, not whatever may or may not have happened to somebody, somewhere in the late 90s in Ms. Holland's history class, and then inexplicably again during a 2012 presentation meeting on office supply budgets. So let's focus on 2017.
As with any backlog list worth its salt, the goal here is to complete as many of the following in the twelve months to come. I managed half the 2016 list (many of its survivors have thus passed onto this list, naturally) so here's hoping I do a little better this year. Probably won't though, because there's at least five enormous JRPGs below, but a guy can dream at least.
As with last year's remorse assortment, or remorstment (?!), I've separated this list into three groups:
For the sake of... I dunno, "fun", here are my Lists of Shame for 2016, 2015, 2014 and 2013. A few familiar faces seem to reappear every year. Strange, that.
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[B] This one... I'm probably going to put off until 2018. One Yakuza game a year's usually enough for me, given how long they take me to complete.
[B] This one... has to have one of the biggest box art image/title mismatches in a long while. Oh you will taste my trail of cold steel, senpai, if that's what it takes for you to notice me. Anyhoo, can't have enough Falcom RPGs.
[B] This one... is a trippy time-travelling visual novel that I've been meaning to try out for a while. This recently localized console version popped up in a sale recently, so here we are. Or here we will be? Or were? Whoa, I'd better save all this temporal confusion for the playthrough.
[B] This one... is now at the top of the 3DS queue. It's been a hot minute since I last gesticulated at some fancypants flamboyant prosecutor. I'd better remember how the Japanese legal system works. I know there was a law about cross-examining parrots...
[B] This one... is the only PS4 game from my backlog at the start of last year to emerge unscathed to the beginning of this one. It's an impressive feat of me not wanting to play a thing, but I suspect I might still get around to it eventually regardless. I mean, it did come free with the system. Maybe I want to see what this iconic hat business is about before trying the sequel.
[B] This one... let me ask you this, reader: have you ever had a Luigi dream that you, um, you had, your, you, you could, you’ll do, you, you once, you, you could do so, you, you’ll do, you could, you, you want, you want them to do you so much you could do anything?
[B] This one... this damn game, even. No More Heroes 2 has been on my List of Shame for probably a decade now, even though it came out in 2010. Enough's enough. Boy, that really sounded convincing, huh? See you next year, No More Heroes 2. Tell Let It Die I said hi.
[B] This one... I'm less serious about completing this year. Don't get me wrong, I like Metal Gear and Platinum and Nanomachines, Son, but I felt like I left the franchi... oh hell, I was supposed to go back to MGSV and write that all-tapes blog. Well, then, I guess I'll continue to disappoint fans of this series for another year.
[B] This one... is an RPG from InXile, to whom I not-so-recently gave money for a Kickstarter project. The incentive for my donor level was to get a digital copy of Wasteland 2 for free, and I've yet to take advantage. There's going to be hella RPGs to play next year, but maybe I'll find a quiet moment to pick my way across the post-apocalypse.
[B] This one... will become the sad funeral dirge for my PSP. Once I've played through this trailblazing SRPG, my PSP might well be retired forever because I've got nothing else for it and nothing else I'm inclined to buy for it that I can't get on Steam or PSN. That little black box has been on death row long enough, it's time to put it out of its misery.
