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Parabole

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Wild 9 HD, please!

 Earthworm Jim HD's been out for the Xbox live marketplace and from previews, it looks amazing. Updated graphics and ratified controls make this version of Earthworm Jim one to get a hold of. Hopefully however, more of Shiny Entertainments back catalog will get a HD upgrade because most of their games were awesome. Some examples are MDK, Messiah, where a baby angel possesses humans under gods orders. Never really saw it, but in preview it said the baby could possess people and make them commit suicide, which was crazy seeing it in a magazine. But my all time favorite game is Wild 9.  

 Games best feature!
 Games best feature!
        Before I had even heard of Bionic Commando and not really putting this and Earthworm Jim together, Wild 9 had everything I wanted out of my PS1. Awesome story about a ragtag group of space travelers with dysfunctions which actually made them useful get separated and must be regrouped by their fearless...strike that, clumsy and zany leader. Multiple planets with different gameplay. My favorite parts where the freefall levels where you can actually grab an enemy and slam through barriers. Awesome characters like an extremely allergic character that explodes every time he sneezes. A Midget with a million pockets that hold everything for any situation, but never seems to pull out the right thing. And a hot alien chick that has hair that will EAT anything, but freezes if she's in the dark. There's more characters but the instruction manual does a better job of painting their persona's. 
         The reason I made the Bionic Commando reference is for my all time favorite gameplay feature and gadget, The Rig! The whole game is based on torturing enemies and swinging with your electric whip. The whip can swing the character onto levels and grab enemy rockets and throw them back. But the reason it comes in handy is because of the inventive and cruel ways to kill or use enemies. The rig can grab enemies and drown them in water or stick them on spikes to create stepping stones. Most of the time its just fun to slam them on the ground like in the cartoons or stick them in a grinder, but some levels actually require you stick a couple enemies in a fan to gunk up the machine so you can pass.
      This is a great game that should be remastered, and just like Earthworm Jim, it's freaking hilarious. Maybe I'm hoping it will come to HD, but I really do hope that it will come out as a Playstation network game so people can play it. And because I lost my copy.
 Loading screens can only capture so much humour.
 Loading screens can only capture so much humour.
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You don't know BIT!

          By coincidence, I was looking into the Chiptune concept page and saw that it barely has any good music or artist to portray how awesome the chiptune music is. I'm going to include in this article some good artist and songs to showcase how good Videogame music and how musicians are using it now. Also, when I get the chance I'll try to update the page.
 
 

    
  
 
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The Last Airbender: Why are the kids mad?

          I love Avatar. I remember seeing it in high school and getting excited over the martial arts and the movements expressing the bending. I would wait for new episodes and enjoyed the playfulness of the characters and Sokka's sarcasm. I wish there was more and got a little disappointed with how it ended, but I watched the whole show again on Netflix and it made me happy. 
           Unfortunately nothing of the movie is making me want to go see it. And I saw the Chow Yun Fat Dragonball Z. I would go see movies that were based on TV shows and games and give them the benefit of the doubt, because at least it resembled it. I drew the line on Avatar and so did everybody who thought that the actors didn't look the part. I would've went with the flow, but the Avatar kid look's mad all the time. That's not his whole character. Sokka doesn't look funny and the short clip of Katara and Zuko fighting looks lame. And it appears from the commercials that the movie encompasses the whole first season and everybody's pissed off. I can not believe I need to make the decision to not see this movie. For the first time, I will wait for the Blu-ray. 

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The Saboteur so far

   (spoilers, if that matters)  First thing that caught my eye was the 20 dollar price tag, and second was the fact that Saboteur was from the out of business developer Pandemic. The last game they made and the slightly positive buzz on this game got me to give it a shot. After a while, I realized how familiar this game was to Pandemic's previous title of Mercenaries 2. 
     So much destruction! I have been playing the story mode, or specifically, the main story mode and was distraught on how bland it is. The Train and bridge explosion level was exciting but it felt like this is all the game could come up with. I was going to reference the zeppelin level, but that was more of the players forcing the game to be interesting. What seemed unfortunate was that a couple of the Main story levels were over just as soon as they began. There was a part after a mission, another main mission prompts up saying to talk to Veronique, you do, level over.  Some of the Main missions are that simple. 
    What I was trying to get to was the ambient missions. If you buy all the maps and think that blowing up 30 or so snipers nest was a lot, wait till you see the map of France COVERED in Ambient dots! I thought that this was a completionist dream and fun. That was until I realized that it becomes annoying after a while. I noticed the similarity between The Saboteur and Mercenaries 2, the repetitive explosions are what save most of the games. Destroying things are more fun that playing the main story. Mercenaries 2 was about getting vengeance on your buttcheek and right now I'm at a level where I have beat Dierker in a race in The Saboteur. Didn't I have an exciting fight with him on a blimp?

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Summer job

             It's time to look for work and it seems an opportunity showed up working for Gamestop. There's a store where I live that has the "Now Hiring" sign out front and I'm conflicted. I have been listing all their faults since the first time I sold all my then gaming collection of N64 and PS1 games, and still only made half to afford the PS2. Scratched games, strict return policies, and recently trying to pass off locating a game underneath a counter and shoving it inside a gamebox as "New." I drew the line and decided not to return again because the manager, A guy I desperately tried to impress when I tried to get a job previously, Drool in front of a new game. I said banned, nothing but Amazon for me. I remember buying a four disc set of Koudelka and the game froze near the end of the 4th disc! I had passed the return dateand I couldn't see how it ended.
              But then I went inside to get my application and filled it out. I haven't turned it in because I'm mulling it over. Employee's get "Benefits" and they're in the control of power. Maybe it could be a dream come true of selling and talking about games like it says on their website. What I really want to do is just play games, but I just need a job to do that.

3 Comments

The rundown of people you don't want to meet at the arcades!

               Going through some old movies I noticed that Arcades where fun places to hang out. Being among friends and just being in an atmosphere specifically catered to the great love of videogames. Unfortunately, like in the movies, there is always one type of character that ruins the experience. Take note of these characters who ruined some possible childhood memories.

  Cops - Robocop 2 [1990] 
 
Actually, if you're being trailed by cops then your day was ruined since you got there. But in seriousness (as close to it, anyway), Cops or any authority figure just create a nerve wracking atmosphere. They are usually there to bust up a drug deal nearby or to locate miscreants or missing children. Downer. 
  
 

  Gangs - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles [1990] 
 
This version of an arcade was actually pretty cool when I saw it (6yrs old) and wanted to go there, but then I learned that smoking is bad and so is stealing. Thanks Tiny Toons. [Bonus arcade, link<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QnvDwHtlgM>. Also, as with all that skateboarding and underage gambling there comes a price: being recruited into a gang. 
Now the gang in question is The Foot, a name so silly and with a reputation for being beat up by Turtles that they have to be twice as dangerous as April o'Neil makes them out to be. But still, real gangs or just older kids that tend to have a bad reputation make having fun at an arcade dangerous!  
 
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  Bullies - Encino Man [1992] 

This is a particular problem if you're a geek or in love with the popular girl that’s dating the bully or any other movie roles our lives were based on. The problem with bullies is that there are usually one which is not enough to call the cops but make your day suck.

                The good thing with bullies is that with one good training montage, you could be the one to beat up the bully, get the girl, and hear your name chanted by the other kids. I follow the Rocky school of training.  skip to 2:54.

  
 

  Brothers - Double Dragon [1994] 
 Twice the ass-beatings of a normal bully and the added bonus of coming home to, guess? That's right, another ass whooping! Just picture Biff from Weird Science . It's typical for the older brother to worry about what's where the chicks are and not little brother's fascination to get to the pier on time before the arcades close. The cool thing is little brothers have all the adventure's and for some reason big brother's always turned into something? 

    True not all brothers are macho dudes that rather pump weights than help a brother out. In Double Dragon's, Billy's brother is actually possessed by a T-1000.

 
 
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Fan of Twisted Metal for another reason.

I enjoyed Twisted Metal: Black just like everyone, but not for the combat. I enjoy the Twisted Metal franchise for the stories they tell. In TM2, I would cheat my way to each characters ending just to see the comic book vignette of how Calypso twisted the words of the winner for unfortunate, and sometimes hilarious consequences.  
 
 
 

     The best stories where from Twisted Metal: Black. Every character had a beginning, middle, and end for their story and it was always something creative. The best part was the CG movies and also the ending screen with the Rolling Stones - Painted Black. 
  Of course I will try and play the new Twisted Metal without cheating, but the only thing I'm looking forward to are the stories. With current gen technology and Dark stories akin to Tales from the crypt, I'm expecting to play as everybody!
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Subscription card in the middle

I love magazines! Ever since I was a kid, I would ogle the magazines on the Supermarket racks. I first picked up a Videogame magazine for Tips & Tricks, but then I would just look at the pictures. My first Subscription was to PSM (Playstation Magazine) now P:TOM, Playstation: The Official Magazine. I loved PSM because of the Comic book Covers and The fun and exciting ways the art mixed with what the writers were talking about. I picked up a couple of magazines and have been satisfied, but a little overwhelmed to read so many and recently I subscribed to Game Informer. Of course I was buying a game at Gamestop and got tied in, but it seemed like a deal. Game Informer is an okay magazine, but I have recently tidied up my magazine pile and noticed that all my Game Informers have subsciption cards in the middle. I'm not particularly surprised since I now read twice as much news online and in print, but Game Informer for me lacks something. I considered GI as a newspaper because of its size and writting, and I haven't been kind to actual newspapers in a longtime. I read newspapers but they lack connectivity for me. I won't let go of GI, but it's going to be hard to finish one in the future.

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Play Magazine

I subscribed to Play Magazine around October of 2009 because I love their artwork, but I stopped getting issues around February 2010. I went to their website and its down. I went to look at their other publication Geek Monthly, and its also down. As far as I can figure Fusion Publishing lost those publications to Bankruptcy. It's really bad too because those were some great magazines. Play especially had some awesome art.  On a related note, there is an article concerning the discontinuation of Play magazine by bitmob.com.

http://www.bitmob.com/articles/play-magazine-the-quiet-death-of-another-gaming-publication
 
www.playmagazine.com
 
http://www.geekmonthly.com/
 That's bedroom poster worthy.
 That's bedroom poster worthy.

  
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