I have been playing FFXIV for a long time now and I am just getting to the point where I am not liking the game and bored out of my mind everytime I play it. A few months ago I got a girlfriend to whom I am still with, and she seemingly plays FFXIV all the time and enjoys the game, plays with others and never gets bored with the game. It honestly baffles me.. a lot of the content is catered to newer people, and very little content actually comes out for people who have been playing for a long time minus the expansions.

I have been in a static raiding savages for quite some time as well, and it just seems to me that all these dungeons and raids are a grindfest. All the mechanics feel the same, new bosses have the mechanics of older bosses. The theme of the bosses can be quite familiar at times, and sometimes the design of the boss is just outright horrible to look at. Regardless, it also sucks that when you play this game it's encouraged you play all the classes and get them all leveled up, as well as gear them. When gearing is a huge pain in the ass. It sucks even more because of the cap which essentially requires you to put invest weeks of your time just to gear one class.

The designs of the dungeons are very similar a lot of the time as well, and the concept really bores the hell outta me because it is always the same shit. Kill trash mobs to get to first boss, kill boss, kill trash mobs to second boss, rinse and repeat. Trials are literally just kill one boss. Which were interesting to see at first from ARR/Heavensward. Then it started to just get boring and annoying when Stormblood/Shadowbringers came out.

The Main Story is utterly ridiculous because a lot of the characters have "plot armor" in which it might seem that they died, which is backed by npcs, later on to them being fully okay and able to fight. Excuse me Square Enix? These characters are not deities, you can't just toss around the idea of death to the viewer and then make them go through a cutscene displaying the person's death only to have that same person who you saw just die come back like nothing happened.

Anyway, my girlfriend talks about FFXIV all the time and it starts to get irritating more and more as time goes on. I don't even like seeing the game and it feels like the very idea is being forced down my throat. The game that I've grown some disinterest in I am forced to see and it just sucks. Like everytime I look at FF in my head, it just keeps reminding me of the gear treadmill, the boredom, the overrated bosses. It's as though while I don't play it very much, it's become forcibly a part of my life. It stresses me out a bit and gives me anxiety everytime she plays, which is why I take medication, and I already told her how I feel and such. Because the only way to play with her really is to play FFXIV, and I get nervous that eventually I might be neglected because she will be always playing that game. Don't get me wrong, I used to love the game a lot. But after years of playing it, it has grown very stale to me. I could go play other games that do what FFXIV does but better.

I have a bad past, and have had bad experiences with past relationships, but this FFXIV thing doesn't help me at all. I just don't know what to do at this point.. the idea of seeing FFXIV everyday for many years to come despite my disinterest just puts a really bad distaste in my mouth. And yet, there's nothing I can do about it because of morals and such. sigh

had to vent.. not even my best friends helped me.. all of them thought I was just being illogical, and they won't take the time to understand me. My girlfriend most of all, doesn't understand me at all because even though i've expressed my concerns, she always brings up FFXIV.. always . Always wants to play, always wants to collect, always wants to complete everything, grind for gear for fucking weeks on end. Even though she tells me we can play other things, I highly doubt she will ever want to get off that dam game of her own volition to hangout with me unless I asked her to, she will never bother to make any initiative unless we're in fucking bed sleeping or something. Why am I feeling this way so intensely.. I am just so bothered by all of it.

quit the game and either talk to or break up with your girlfriend

Yah man I think you should definitely take a serious look at what is going to be the best for you in the long run. Although a slightly different situation without as many personal strings attached, I had a similar situation when playing Destiny a while back. I was raiding with people that were having a blast long pas the point where the game became a chore for me to play. Despite enjoy the social interaction I quit because I simply was not enjoying the actual gameplay part anymore.

It was the right decision in the end. You have to make up your mind if gritting your teeth daily while others are having a blast is the right thing for you. I mean it looks like you already know, but you have to take that next step yourself.

You shouldn't play something you've grown to hate for the sake of another person, you'll just grow more and more bitter about it and eventually them. Don't try to take away something they like for your sake either, or project your problems with a game onto them because they're still having a great time with it.

I hate to say it, but it sounds like your problem might be more with your girlfriend and your relationship with her than the game.

Not liking a game is totally fine. Your interests don't need to 100% overlap with your partner's. However, if this is causing significant problems in your relationship, then you need to have an open and honest talk with your partner. You can try to find a healthy balance that allows them to continue doing the thing they like while keeping the relationship going, or if you find that it's not possible to reconcile, you both might just need to agree to go your separate ways.

Also, obligatory...

Thank you, I've never been disappointed yet looking for this image inside these kinds of threads.

EDIT: I also agree with your post.

This seems like a bigger issue than with final fantasy xiv. You don't give any information about your girlfriend and if she forces you to play it or talk about it. People will have different interests and fair enough if she is also forcing the game on you. If not though, then I think you need to see if your actually not that interested in her.

If you are, then you need to figure out why her liking this game is bothering you so much. You don't have to play or even like the game, but, if she is not forcing the game on you, then you need to cut her some slack for liking it.

Besides agreeing with the other posters about more then FF14 going on here I would suggest the following. I am unsure if you play other games (you feel like someone whos been fairly committed to a single game), but I would suggest maybe stop playing FF14 and try other games.

If you are big into MMOs WoW classic releases soon, and ESO also exists. There are also plenty of other multiplayer games such as BRs (Apex), MOBAs (LoL), FPS (Siege), or even more less known games like Vermintide 2, Total War series, Civs, God Eater 3, etc that you can try. Assuming you enjoy the game you can start talking about it with her while she talks about FF14, presumably she will want to give it a try since you enjoy it and its in her wheelhouse of gaming and FF14 will become less of a thing.

It sounds like you feel so intensely because of what you perceive to be a lack of effort on your girlfriends part. I think the conversation is less "how do i get her to stop playing this game" and more how do you go about expressing that you feel she is neglecting the relationship in favor of a hobby. Communication is hard and most people fail and have trouble telling their loved ones what it is they truly have an issue with. If it truly is an addition that is ruining your relationship that is a different story with no solid answers. Either way good luck and I hope things get better for you whatever that may mean for you.