Like you, I couldn't get past the clunkiness of the game. I don't think it's me as I've beaten every Souls game but 3 [learned the hard way that DS3 somehow still didn't have cloud saves] and yet I was constantly dying in Mortal Shell when my character simply wasn't doing what I wanted. I can't tell if it's some issue with reading inputs or stitching animations: just testing it in safe spots away from enemies, mashing R1 and R2 I couldn't even consistently get the standard attack sequences to complete. Same with hardening, where I was able to harden mid-attack in maybe 5% of my attempts.
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