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MachoLucha

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2.1 stars

Average score of 20 user reviews

A Disappointing Cash-In On The Saints Row Popularity 0

Is It The Same Saint’s Row I Know And Love?The core tenants of the “Saints Row” experience are kind of present; they take matters into their own hands and have the same carefree approach to their problems as ever, even when confronted with the prospect of taking down Satan. But if you thought where Saints Row 3 and 4 excelled was the writing, and you’re looking for more of that, then, sadly, you’re looking in the wrong place.The main cause for this, is there’s...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

Round And Round You Go... You Did It? Great, Do It Again... And Again... 0

It feels more like a proof of concept than a fully-fledged game, offering you a few different objectives for a quest, rather than an actual grand adventure to embark on. Well, except some, which task you with; get to the centre of the board. Most are just; buy a sword, kill something, go get healed. Quest complete.There are some that are more interesting, like rescuing a princess and returning her to the castle... But the game doesn't go far enough with these tasks, nor is there enough of them.A...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

The Ultimate Nerve Wracking Experience; Will The AI Go Left Or Right? 0

Pixel Piracy is the only game I know of where the results of your time investment can just randomly be taken away from you, leaving you in a state where its almost impossible to progress with the game.You take the role of the captain of a ship, build yourself a crew, buy them food and pay their wages to keep them happy, kit them out with the finest of weaponry... Oh and fight other pirates in navel warfare... Sounds cool right?Except when you tell your crew to go board the enemy ship and, with t...

2 out of 2 found this review helpful.

The Goofy Tale Of Extremists, Foreigners, And Laughable Bosses 0

You start with your aimless samurai sailing to town, fortunately there just happens to be an all out war going on at the harbour when you arrive with most the main players in town showing up. You slash a bunch of fools, then get to "choose a side". The game wastes no time in setting up exactly what's going on here.Sadly, no side feels completely sympathetic... But the British have Jet Jenson and Melinda Megamelons...Later some kind of head honcho came to town, I interrupted his procession shouti...

3 out of 4 found this review helpful.

One Of The Best Vampire Games In Existance... If You Ignore The Second Half 0

Based on the pen and paper role playing game of the same title name, Bloodlines tells the tale of various breeds of vampire living in the world of humans, trying to uphold the Masquerade that they're just normal everyday humans... Which means fit in, or they're going to be sending the disciplinary squad after you!The game opens up as pretty much a turf war, and later descends into an end of the world prophecy story. Your progression from lowest rung on the ladder to working for the big cheese/be...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

An Awesome Story Hidden Behind Terrible Gameplay 0

Lucius didn't have much chance of leading a normal life, right from the get go, he's the subject of a summoning ritual while in the womb, and if that wasn't bad enough, at age 6 Satan decides it's time he became a contract killer.Though don't get your hopes up that this is childhood assassin's creed, there's no combat, or planning out your custom method for taking out the designated target. Instead each "level" is; you wander around until the camera zooms over to your designated target, then you...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

A Stellar Illustration Of Generic Survival Horror 0

Sometimes it feels unfair to judge a game based on promises from the outside, that the game itself on the box doesn't promote... However the fact that it was "developed" by Shinji Mikami being a prominent feature of the game's advertising (that's how they've written it on Amazon), and constant references to how he was the mastermind behind the original Resident Evil games... Then it's hard to not build up expectations...And guess what, it plays and handles just like Resident Evil 4... To the ext...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

A Masterpiece In Awful Design 0

It boggles my mind that a game notorious for being meticulous when it comes to the presentation and recreation of cars can suffer so badly from some of the worst menus I've seen in gaming.I'll prefix this by saying; the racing part of this game, it's fine. It's Gran Turismo. If you've played one of the others the handling will feel completely familiar. If you're only used to arcade racers, it might take a bit of adjusting, but it plays fine.Everything else that the racing is packaged inside of? ...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

If Survival Is This Tedious... Death Might Be Better 0

Survival apparently comes down to three things; kill anything that poses a threat, build better weapons and take care of your bodily needs. Simple enough ideas, which in this game, are implemented so badly that interacting with them is pretty much the only source of horror.Okay, the killing isn't badly implemented, unless you're playing with keyboard and mouse, in which case I often had the character aiming in a direction that wasn't where I had the cursor, kind of a fundamental problem. The con...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

Alien: Isolation? "Android: Collective" Is More Accurate (Spoilers) 0

It's clear the desire of this game is to immerse you in the world of the original Alien movie. Mission accomplished, the game sets up some amazing atmosphere. But when it comes to what you have to *do* in this fabulously designed environment... It all falls apart.I'll be upfront, I hated this game. And while I can concede a certain amount of that will come down to personal preference and that other people may enjoy what I didn't, I found the gameplay to be some of the most monotonous I've ever e...

3 out of 4 found this review helpful.

A-Bliss Odyssey For Aesthetics, But Lacking In All Other Ways 0

Combining the procedural nature and character progression of roguelikes and the combat of a side scrolling beat 'em up, Abyss Odyssey feels like a watered down version of both rather than taking the best elements.The dungeon crawling nature doesn't really combine well with the side scrolling aspect. The Abyss is split into short dungeon levels, pretty much all of which are a straight line left or right, go down a bit, then travel left and right again, rinse and repeat. Levels feature some minor ...

2 out of 2 found this review helpful.

Dread The Random Difficulty 0

Tile based procedurally generated dungeon crawler.From that alone most people will already know whether this is the type of game they want to play. If that's the kind of game that appeals to you, then you'll be happy to know that Dungeons of Dredmor offers a pretty polished experience in that vein.However, the game is sadly a victim of the typical problems of procedurally generated games. Just as the items that litter the dungeon floor and the level layout are random, so are the enemy placements...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

Learn About Japan, Life, Love... And Creepy Otaku... 0

Ever felt like watching anime isn’t enough insight to what it’s actually like to visit Japan? Well enter your name, step into the shoes of the ultimate otaku stereotype and experience what it’s like to trick two young girls into letting you stay with them while you take in the sights of Japan.The story revolves around spending a week in Japan and selecting one of several areas available to go visit. One of the girls you stay with will escort you to the area to narrate informati...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

As Repetitive As Real Life 0

Given that tomodachi is the Japanese for “friend”, this game has a bit of a misleading title, given that it’s less about friendship and more just about Miis trying to get it on. In fact tell a Mii that they should just be friends with another and they get really bummed out.The initial premise of the game is that you take ownership of an island and hotel, but quickly get bored and wish you had more friends to play with. So then begins the task of filling up your hotel with Miis,...

1 out of 4 found this review helpful.

Really Needs Some Dread Putting In 0

As of writing this, only “Act 1” is available, this is worth mentioning since on the steam store page there’s a little note saying “Act 2” will be a free update that comes “later”. Is it fair to review the game when not all the content is out? Then again, is it fair to charge for a game when what’s available amounts to barely anything?At first I got vibes of a teen slasher film; a group of students on a road trip (with their teacher for some reason...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

Like Killing Plants And Zombies? Play Something Else. 0

How often does the opening of a game feature the courageous hero, musclebound and full of bravado, struggling to take out a single enemy? Bound By Flame has a strange dichotomy where cutscenes and gameplay seem don’t seem to convey the same sense of struggle. After a demon find its way into your body as the result of a ritual gone wrong, he often derides the hero as being pitiful, although the game has you slaughter hordes of enemies even without his powers. Of course he’s going to w...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

How Can A World So Lush Feel So Empty? 0

I'm not sure I know of a more generic story of innocent child thrust into a situation far beyond their understanding, yet somehow being depended on to save the world against an evil that exists solely for the purpose of being an adversary. Yet, somehow, Child of Light manages to transform this tried out storyline into something that’s incredibly charming, despite everyone being one step away from breaking out into song and dance.Unarguably the game's biggest draw is its aesthetics; the art...

3 out of 3 found this review helpful.

Dare You Face The Horror Of Empty Rooms And Reading? 0

At first I felt apprehensive playing Daylight, feeling it was doing a pretty good job of building up an oppressive atmosphere; however so little happens, and what does happen is incredibly predictable, that my mood quickly switched to frustration, and subsequently to boredom. For example the random closing of doors had me spooked at first, wondering what I was going to see when I opened it... Nothing ever appeared. Things get knocked over or gently pushed across the floor, but they're completely...

3 out of 3 found this review helpful.

As Bland As Its Colour Scheme 0

For me, LUFTRAUSERS is a game that exemplifies the current 'indie craze' of being lauded for artistic style in place of actual content. In a way it's a sign of change (and in a good way at that) that these types of games are getting main stream recognition, but in another lifetime it feels like LUFTRAUSERS would have just been a flash game, and would have been free.LUFTRAUSERS gimmick is its sepia hued. That’s basically it. Though you can unlock different hues, I never played with them, th...

1 out of 2 found this review helpful.

Filled To The Brim With Jokes, Devoid Of Gameplay. 0

Jazzpunk presents itself as a parody of spy movies, but quickly wears out its welcome with never ending references and sight gags, most completely unrelated to the task at hand, leaving you with a thin vein of a plot to serve as a vehicle from one joke to the next.That’s not to say all the humour is bad, but a lot is random for the sake of being random. There's no narrative hooks for many of the jokes, they just exist for the sole purpose of delivering a punchline; experience it and move o...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.