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Nicki Knack has been running SimValley's trinket store for over 30 years, so keep the marble jokes to your self.
McClean might stand taller if it weren't for that chip on his shoulder. Be careful around this grumpy character.
A warm and friendly man, Uncle Hayseed is your dad's... or is it your mom's... well, he's someone's older brother!
Claire Clutterbell is best known as SimValley's official poet laureate... a title she generously gave herself.
Duane Doldrum is an arrogant yet occasionally charming slacker with 100 ideas, and 100 excuses.
Hester Primm is SimValley's only librarian and self-appointed manners and ettiquette guru. Be nice.
One part hippie, one part road-rage, Mel Odious is an angry man trying to kick (or punch) his inner demons.
Everyday seems like election day with bubbly, bright-eyed Nora around – but this is just a depressing illusion.
Vera is the lead singer of local band 'The Germinators' (Currently disbanded until she can find other musicians.)
Vernon has been working for the same company, at the same desk, for the same pay for 30 years... Yes, he's angry.
Darius uses his size and cool composure to stop fights before they begin. A good guy to have in your corner.
Kris is a smart and sassy dreamer, currently working as King Tower's lead custodian.
Ewan is a builder for whom every project, no matter how minor, is an opportunity for artistic enlightenment.
A fashionista from out of town. Crystal has come to Miniopolis to check out the scene and steal some good ideas.
Research Assistant and part time think-tank pundit, Polly Nomial is geeky, pretentious, and nauseatingly brilliant.
If there is a conspiracy to unearth, you can bet local journalist Lincoln Broadsheet with be there, shovel in hand.
Sue Pirnova is a college student struggling to find her path. This year she's majoring in physics. What will next year bring?
Lily is Daddy B's attorney and business partner. She means well, but is a terrible judge of character.
You'd be hard pressed to find another person as talented, fearless, and crazy as this local carnie, Roxanna Moxie.
Pritchard is an actor temporarily waiting tables at a restaurant outside Miniopolis. Or is it the other way around?
Once an actor, now a part-time director and manager of the cinema, Theresa is 100 percent old-school class.
Boo is one of your strong, silent types - a gentle man with a mind running riot with ideas.
If you think Berkeley is the model of human honesty and decency, he's got some swamp-land to sell you.
Busta is from a strange land just across the pond from Miniopolis. He’s busy doing nothing much.
Clem is the more talkative of the two bayou brothers, though they share an insatiable thirst for invention.
Cynthia is one of the warmest and most soft-spoken people around, but she usually reserves this kindness for animals.
‘Mokey’ has a strange way about him, a confidence you can’t quite put your finger on. And he’s pretty cool too.
Stern but affordable, the multi-talented Futo Maki is one of the city’s legendary luminaries.
Gary’s a kind old gentleman, but just a touch hard of hearing. Speak up when you talk to him or he’ll miss the gist completely.
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